Microsoft Bashed. As Usual

The European Court has now ordered Microsoft to offer a version of Windows that comes without MediaPlayer. This is good news for companies who hate Microsoft and want everyone to be forced to pay extra for their own shoddy knock off copies of applications that Microsoft already make better.

Say what you like about Bill Gates, but it was his vision that put an affordable computer on everyone’s desk, and it was his vision that made sure when I write a document here in Yorkshire, I can email it to my family all over the world without having to worry about whether or not they can open it.

All these other wining idiots that hang on Microsoft’s coat tails and bleat about Microsoft’s unfair domination of the market would have had a lot more credibility if they’d been smart enough to actually invent something, rather than just sticking their own logos on somebody else’s great ideas.


STOP PRESS

The European Commission has decided that the Ford Motor Company has acted uncompetitively by fitting brakes as standard to its production line cars. In a statement issued by the European Union High Court, Philippe Le Froag said that there were many other manufacturers of brake parts that were losing out due to Ford’s unfair domination of the market.

From now on, Ford will have to make a version of all their cars available without brakes, so that new buyers will be able to fork out an additional £1267 for new braking systems of their choice.

“This is a great day for competitive practice.” The chairman of Lucas Brakes announced. “From now on, People will no longer be forced to accept Ford brakes. Motorists are finally able to buy their cars break-free, and now they are even free to choose to drive without them.”

A spokesman from the Commission for Common Sense withdrew and shot himself in the head.